Lack of privacy

This lack of privacy is driving me crazy.
I need to be left ALONE.

The only reason I'm up at 4am in the morning is because I want to BE ALONE.
So why is there people lurking around my personal time and space, making it impossible for my to move on. I didn't sacrifice sleep for fun DAMN YOU.

And somehow, I'm allergic to red wine....
Damn itchy.
Sorry for the ranting but I'm FREAKING pissed off right now.

Honey I know this act...

Mark: Have you ever doubted a kiss or two?
Joanne: This is spooky...

Who would have thought I'm back to the Rent musical craze?


The Tango Maureen
Gotta dance till your diva is through
You pretend to believe her
Cause in the end -- you can't leave her
But the end it will come
Still you have to play dumb
Till you're glum and you bum
And turn blue
Why do we love when she's mean?
And she can be so obscene
(Joanne) My Maureen...

I know why this song sticks. Coz it's about how Mark and Joanne likes this girl Maureen despite her cheating on them etc. Unconditional love, not viable in rational utility-seeking individuals (in theory of economics) but they nonetheless exist.

Isn't this abstractly beautiful?

The Lottery Moment

The probability of 1/5040, that is how much chance you have to win in 4D (a local authorised lottery game in Singapore).

However with a cummulative shareholder returns of -21.60%, what are the chances that a lottery moment could be on the way?

Background Explanation: This is a simulation game from a mod in school. It's like Theme Hospital and Rollercoaster Tycoon without the visuals. All we have are numbers. The business is on cell phones and we have no idea what the cell phone we are selling look like and so on.

Imagine the shock when I entered the site to see this:


Nope I didn't notice the largest profit. What I first saw was that my team was NOT the firm with the largest loss.

Then I came to this chart:

Wow, some firm just made a breakthrough from that "red ocean" of intense competition.
Wait a minute! Isn't green our colour?

And I went back to the previous site (this) AGAIN:

And just imagine the shock when I saw MY team at the largest profit rank.
Imagine seeing yourself at the "largest loss" position for more than 1 month since the game started, who would have thought that Lord would be so kind to grant us this miracle?

Even if it were for a moment, a moment was all I needed.
I who notice the short-lived beauty; the fireworks that took hours to set up and last only 10 seconds; the dance show we rehearsed for 3 months for that 30 mins to shine; the falling leaves; this is one of them. Thank you for the chance.

To continue the winning streak or not, let us use mortal means to achieve them from now on.
.
.
.

Here's a beautiful song that fit the moment:
"Chances are when said and done, who would be the lucky ones who will make it all the way?"
- Chances, Five for fighting

But a final shoutout to my darling team: we, the resilient bunch. Keep on rocking. =)
(and of coz I believe it was the great minds that made this possible, not just the bunch of superstition-sounding crap at all.)


Ps. Btw, just to debuff, I'm a freethinker. Perhaps some God out there had been kind to us. Perhaps the forces of nature did the trick. Or maybe it's just a trick of chance and statistics.

Chicken Soup for the bored undergrad

Even with assignments piling, you are caught in the "dreamer's disease", you are absolutely not alone. Undergrads like me are inherently bored and need some otherworldly assignments to humour ourselves.

One example of an otherworldly task for the bored:
Reading Shojo manga in Japanese.


Translation notes (thoughts):
Girl: Ee.. why why but I've checked (thoroughly) yesterday.
Guy: (gloating) Unbelievable...
Girl: Oh ya! That time, I wanted to bring my mechanical pencil and pencil but I forgot to put them in!!!
Guy: There's an idiot here. Although this is a boring school, there's an idiot here.
Girl: What should I do? What should I do?
Guy: Interesting.

Coming from a pre-advanced amateur who doesn't hand in homework, there's all I gather here.
But it's fun putting your language skills to test sometime. But I bet those pros out there are probably laughing at my interpretation errors. =X


Always love the nature scene best. Isn't it just beautiful?
Here's an epic tree in Chinese cemetery Lim Chu Kang.

I believe there's no such thing as no beauty in the natural landscape of urban Singapore, we just got to look hard enough to find them. And it's always coincidental to stumble upon one. Just wished I bring my camera with me daily wherever I go.

Photo credits: Mei Juan

Couldn't figure out

There's a couple of of things I couldn't figure out,
why nobody's using twitter,
why both Picasa and Flickr fail to upload such that I could blog the traditional way I always did,
why do we need fiction when we live in a non-fictitious world...

Ya-duh ya duh.

And finally, why am I not writing like I used to be...
(hope it's not because I'm losing my naivety and ability to derive pleasure from simple things)


A giant collage going out to my dear friends drunk in our moment of randomness.

一番のペレセンート

好きな歌を歌ってあげるのことは　一番のバレンタインデーイのペレセンートって思う。
誕生日のペレセンートもういいけど、今誕生日まだ早いすぎるから。

もし選べれば、一番聞きたいのは Undisclosed Desires.
もし聞くことができない、誰もその曲を歌ってあげなければ、
自分に新しい歌い方を歌っても　かまわない。

And it will goes like this:

I've know you've suffered but you don't need to hide.
It's cold and loveless, but you would not be denied.

Soothing, and you would feel pure
Trust me, you can be sure

Why won't you reconcile the violence in my heart
I hope you'll regconise my beauty's not just a mask
Please come and exorcise the demons from my past
Please help me satisfy these undisclosed desires in my heart

I trick my lovers that I'm wicked and divine
I am a sinner, but take all innocence that's left behind

Please me, show me how it's done
Tease me, you are the one

I know you'll reconcile the violence in my heart
I know you'll regconise my beauty's not just a mask
I trust that we'll exorcise the demons from my past
Let us uncover all the undisclosed desires in our hearts

でもそれはRandomな考えだろう。
全然特別な意味がない。

自分で寂しい時には　その曲が歌えてもいいって思う。

午後からずっと考える

今日は美容院へ行って、髪を染めた。
待ってるの時、その雑誌の内容を気づいた。それに、ずっと考えてる。

彼がいるの女はもとかわいいか？
彼がいないの女性より、彼がいるの女性のほうがかわいい？
雑誌によると、彼がいるの女性自信があるし、男性の考えも心配ないから、彼がいるの女性のほうがかわいいそうだ。
でもそれは男性の馬鹿意見だろう？　もしその女性は彼がいれば、自分にあの女性をできたら、自分は「最高だ」って思える。それも女性の問題じゃない。男性の馬鹿考えだろう？

そのこと、午後からずっと考える。
もしそのこと本当だ、じゃどうする？　
彼がいるのことを見せかける？
あの馬鹿のことをやりたくない。。。
じゃ、自信を持て、男性のことを心配しなくて、それなら男性が好きな女性ね？
私はちょっと変な。。